I screamed at her.
I was a monster in so many regards.
I hadn't felt like I actually mattered to her
in
years.
No matter what asked for
be it space for a few days
or that she not wear a particular outfit
to one of my few shows
or a thousand different little things
she could not give me these things.
It was like she had to make herself
more important to me
than my own needs.
Like she wanted me
to want her around
more than I needed
certain things that defined
the edges of me.
After saying "I need..."
and getting the reply
"Well, how about..."
too many times
I felt under attack,
and reacted thus.
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