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Showing posts with label Rules of Wrist. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Rules of Wrist. Show all posts

Monday, February 15, 2016

Walters' Rules Of Wrist 2-15-16



People recognize your medical condition, until it inconveniences them. After that it’s a character flaw.

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The young often treat their youth as an accomplishment, and age as a failing of character. Ironically, youth is handed out free, whereas getting old takes work.

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People judge complaints they don’t share to be made up or petty.

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“I have to believe” is one of the most disappointing ways to preface a statement in the English language. It implies an understanding that a belief would not survive facts, but a preference to hold onto that belief in spite of reality.

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The serious use of the term “Nanny State”, without a sense of irony or satire, usually means that what you thought was a conversation is actually a lecture.

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Anyone using the term “Statism” as a pejorative will usually spout a bunch of over-simplifications about the greatness of deregulation or anarchy, while demonstrating the philosophical and rhetorical sophistication of 14 year-old boys.

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Average people who think they have discovered a new way of doing something often say “What’s wrong with everyone, that no one does it this way?”
Wise people who think they may have discovered a new way of doing something often say “What’s wrong with my idea, that no one does it this way?”

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There are few social crimes so offensive as leaving your assigned role, regardless of growth you’ve undergone. Those who forgive and adapt to your growth are true friends. 
The rest will ignore your changes, attempting to force you back into your old role, and punishing you should you not comply.

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People need a villain.

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A consensus is usually mistaken for truth by those in agreement.

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To get people to vote against their own interests first scare them, then give them someone to blame.

Fear and anger are, individually, the emotions most detrimental to the perceiving of reality. These two emotions are the easiest to incite in others, as well as two of the most powerful and drug-like.

A skilled orator, seeking to influence many people, can use these emotions in concert to great effect.

Start by scaring the audience about the troubles in their own lives. Include enough believable examples that the point seems grounded in reality. When the fear is at its highest, give them someone to blame.

This is vital: it switches fear to anger, without any intervening emotions.

Fear, on its own, feels weak; it is the emotion of victims, therefore the powerless. Anger conveys certainty, an unassailable belief in the self, in a philosophy, in any course of action that lessens the power of the object of initial fear. More importantly, anger conveys a feeling of power.

To prevent a return of fear and uncertainty, the anger must be recharged regularly. The audience, happy to avoid the feelings powerlessness, will seek this fix on their own, whether directly from the orator, or from conversation with other audience members.

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The consensus of groups of people high on anger overrides any law or scripture, even the ones those people profess to believe.

Friday, June 20, 2014

Walters' Rules of Wrist 6-20-14




Rules of Wrist 6-20-14
Wounded People

 Healing
Deciding you are healed does not make it so. Positive attitude only goes so far. Real healing takes work and time. And it doesn’t count if you haven’t done the work, just waited a while and declared yourself healed.

Over-simplified metaphorical example: A wound that needs stitches will likely not close on its own; do the work, get the stitches. Waiting for it to close will just leave you open to infection.

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Appearances
Being able to parrot socially acceptable views on anger and hatred doesn’t mean you are not angry and hateful; it may just mean you’re so adept at psychological camouflage that you can even hide from yourself.

See Healing.

Seeming is NOT being. The truth is truth, regardless of manipulated public perception, and the truth always comes out.

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 Therapy
Believing yourself immune to therapy is a self-fulfilling prophesy. It also demonstrates a weak ego that needs cheap validation, and a deeply ingrained dishonesty. In “proving” therapy’s ineffectiveness, you are “proving” yourself “right”, and can tell yourself and the world “I tried, but it didn’t work”.

And you can brag that your problems are so bad that they can’t be fixed, casting yourself, at least in your mind, as some kind of superlative, ie “The Worst”, or “The Sickest”, or “The Walkingest Wounded”.

The goal of therapy is to get to the Why of some pervasive thought or feeling that makes your life worse. In fulfilling your own prophesy you are avoiding self-examination and getting at the truth.


The reasons why you sought help did not simply go away just because you wasted a therapist’s time on an exercise of self-congratulation.


See Healing.


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Saviors
No one is going to “hug you so tight that all of your broken pieces will stick back together”, especially not a lover.

Don’t put that burden on someone else.


Don’t sabotage any chance at a successful relationship by this expectation of superhumanity from your lover. You WILL discover that they are JUST human, and your disappointment will be cruel. 

It will ruin your relationship. And likely has ruined others in the past.

If you identify with the notion of having “broken pieces” that need to be stuck “back together”, then you are probably wounded. If you are wounded, you need healing.

But this:


Is bullshit, a fantasy of a quick fix. It’s a daydream of using another person, not just as a drug, but as a cure. And, if that is your goal in a relationship, you should probably remain alone. And you need healing.